Letting Friends Go

Around this time 20 years ago, God gave me a huge warning. He told me it was time to let go of my two closest friends. Wait…What!

These friends had done nothing bad to me. In fact, they helped me through one of the toughest seasons of my life. In the midst of the enormous amount of adult responsibility thrust upon me at 16 years of age, my friends were reminders that I was still a teenager. They were my escape from the turmoil at home. For two years, they had invited me into their home when I needed a break. They listened to my problems at all hours of the night. They ensured I had typical teenage experiences like going to basketball games, hanging out and of course, talking about boys. I welcomed those conversations for two years but what I wanted to talk about was beginning to change.

God’s warning was very loud as he spoke through two dramatic events that should have ended the friendship. I didn’t listen. I was afraid to do life without people who I had come to lean on for support. I was fooled by fear. So when the phone rang, I picked up.

It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man. Psalm 118:8 KJV

A year later, circumstances led to me spending less time with them though I continued communication. I noticed, as time passed, that my relationship with God had begun to grow exponentially during the increased time I was not spending with them. He also began to send people in my life that were just as supportive as my friends were during those tough times. God sent new friends who fed my spirit and helped me grow. Then, God was clear. The season had ended for the old friendships. The rest of my life journey was not to include them and it was time for them to get off this ride. The bus stopped here.

It took some time for me to let them off. Through the years, one of them has shown up at stops along the way. I hate to admit that I have opened the door and let the person back on the bus a couple of times, if only for a little bit. Each time resulted in my regret. Recently, I almost opened the door once again. Then I realized that I had no obligation to open the door to that friendship. My obligation is to obedience to God…first and always. So I decided to keep the door closed. I kept moving. Finally, I can say with confidence that I will not open that door again.

Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly…But his delight is in the law of the LORD…And he shall be like a tree…that bringeth forth his fruit in his season… -Psalm 1:1-3

We don’t like to admit it but obedience is a choice. Obeying God is a difficult choice sometimes, but that difficulty is always founded in fear. We must remember that God loves us. He will never tell us to do something to hurt us. He only wants the absolute best for us. There is no need to be afraid of letting someone go because God always has something better. We must release what he tells us to release to make room for what he has in store.