Daniel Fast Day 12- I hurt him.

Menu- grapefruit, quinoa salad, minestrone soup and too many cashews

Self-control is a beast. It is a discipline that must be learned. It is difficult at best and seemingly impossible at worst. Most importantly, it is a fruit of the spirit that identifies a Christian. Sometimes I have it. Sometimes I don’t.

I’m a little more than halfway through the fast and my struggle is very clear. Time management. Today, I had hours to spend with God and I honestly did not know what to do. I have become so accustomed to playing around on YouTube to pass the time. Now that YouTube is off the table, I realize just how much time it was taking. I find that I am trying to fill the time with other online activity. Not good. Not God.

Part of the problem is the false sense of connection the internet provides. You post something and people respond through likes and comments. You communicate with friends and family through emails. Masterfully photographed pictures of beautiful places make you feel like you’re there. But it’s all fake.

Then, there’s the real God trying to get your attention. We ignore him because he’s not physically tangible. This leads to his voice and his touch being easily dismissed.

I don’t want to do that to him. It hurts me when I am dismissed. Imagine how he feels.

“In all their distress he too was distressed…in his love and mercy he redeemed them; he lifted them up and carried them all the days of old. Yet they rebelled and grieved his Holy Spirit…”

Isaiah 63:9-10 NIV

I screwed up today. I wasted time that should have been spent with him. Our time is too valuable to waste on useless information and fake connections. AND to make matters worse, I just talked about spending more time with him a few days ago! (Day 7)

Self-control will now be a prayer focus for the remainder of the fast. Forget all the stuff I want for my career. I’ll lose it anyway, if I’m not disciplined.
So first things first.

“…clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the flesh.”

Romans 13:14